Tatum: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood

May 2, 2025
Defuse tense situations by actively listening first, then offering constructive solutions.

The fifth step in becoming an effective lube manager might be the hardest to accomplish. This is difficult because you must listen and understand in each situation. There are things that will pop up from time to time every week that you just take control of in the way that you do, being experienced. Sometimes you miss opportunities to grow yourself and your team because you just take over. So, let us just slow down and go over a few situations that you find yourself in while running the shop.

The most likely scenario that you will have is getting people to buy into something that you are changing in the shop. Such changes could include adding a new service, adjusting a procedure, or getting the team on the same page with processes. You need that buy-in to be successful in these changes. I bet that you will have at least one experienced technician who will have to question it, because that is what technicians do. Many work on the idea of “if it isn’t broke, why try and fix it?.

In these cases, we use active listening and hear what they say. When you take the time to listen to why an employee is questioning the change, rather than taking the “do as I say” method, the person that is being heard is more likely to be open to your influence. Huddle up, go over what you want to implement, field questions, and you are more likely to calm any reserves that they may have.

This can absolutely work with customers as well. Think about all the times that you have had someone come in and try to explain to you what they think their issues are and get upset with you when you shut it down prematurely. The way that I like to approach situations is to ask the customer to explain what they are feeling or hearing. I may have an idea quickly of what it is, but I will wait. I then ask some follow up questions after they have made a full explanation. This allows them to feel that you heard them and that you are working on a solution. At this point, you have their attention, and when you go to explain what you think the issues are with the vehicle, they are more open to your suggestions because you heard them out. Active listening is a skill that you can build on each day.

A third scenario in which you can take this method is one that none of us want to hear about: a warranty claim. You already know that you are going to have an upset customer. You are expecting a backlash of swear words and anger. Do you react negatively in these situations? When my team members have this issue arise is to let the customer speak and then use these words: “Let me see what I can do to help you.” This can have an almost immediate 180-degree turn on the situation with the customer. They will feel that you have heard them. Many times, they will apologize if they went a little overboard. Ask them to explain what they saw and what they heard when the issue happened. These are all the key points of information for you to determine what happened and whether you are truly at fault. Keeping customers calm and talking is a terrific way to start to get them to trust you when you go to assess the situation with the vehicle.

The key point in the fifth step is really to listen before you react. Using active listening and involving anyone in the back-and-forth of questions will build confidence in the rapport. Next time you have a situation that you feel is not going the way that you want it to, step back, huddle up and talk it out. Just taking the time to hear what someone has to say can help them understand what and why things may be going the way that they are.  

About the Author

Adam Tatum

Adam Tatum is the Director of Operations for Virginia Lubes, a Jiffy Lube franchisee with 11 locations. He has over a decade of experience in the industry with a proven track record of building customer counts and sales, as well as using innovative ways to bring a new look to the automotive field for both the customer and the employee.  Performance comes from growing your business through people.